Why does minding grandchildren hurt my back?
Because a child grows heavier every month, while your back and wrists stay the same or tire faster. Lifting from the cot, from the floor and into a car seat asks you to bend, twist and hold a wriggling weight away from your body.
In Ipoh, grandparents mind the little ones while their children work, and the day has bath time, meals and the stairs of a terrace house. It is a lot of lifting, and no one counts it.
Which lifts hurt the most?
Think of the moments in your day that make you wince.
- Lifting a child out of a high cot with your back bent.
- Picking a child up from the floor with your legs straight.
- Holding a child on one hip while you cook or walk.
- Bathing a child in a low basin or bucket.
- Carrying a child up the stairs with no free hand for the rail.
Note which ones you do daily. Fix those first, as small changes to a daily lift add up.
How can I lift and carry more safely?
Bring the child close before you lift. Bend your knees, keep your back long and push up with your legs. Hold the child at the middle of your chest, not out in front.
Switch sides when you carry on the hip, so one shoulder does not do all the work. On the stairs, put the child on your hip on the side away from the rail, hold the rail with the other hand and take your time.
Let the child help. A toddler who can climb onto a stool or into the cot cuts your lifting a great deal.
What can I change at home?
Lower the cot mattress as the child grows, and bathe the child in a tub on a table or a stool, rather than on the floor. Keep a stool by the sofa so the child can climb up.
Ask your children for a rule on the stairs: one hand on the rail, always. If the child is heavy, ask them to carry the child up and down at drop-off and pick-up.
Our guide on grandparents babysitting and joint pain covers the knees and hands, and lifting safely at home shows the steps.
How do I talk to my children about it?
Start with how much you enjoy your time with the child. Then say that your back needs help with a few of the lifts, and offer solutions, not complaints.
You might ask them to do the cot and car seat lifts, while you handle meals and play. If you live in Ipoh and your children work in KL, ask them to arrange the heavy lifts for weekends when they visit.
When should I get it checked?
See a doctor first if your back pain comes with leg weakness, numbness in the groin or trouble passing urine. Get a check too if the wrist pain wakes you at night.
A physiotherapist can look at your back, wrist and shoulder and show you exercises that make carrying easier. A home visit lets us see the real cot, stairs and bath. Read how it works on our home physiotherapy page.